How to Respond to (Stupid) Things People Say

Nothing seems to inspire the output of advice and well-meaning comments that pregnancy and new babies do. And let’s face it. Some of the advice and the comments will probably make you want to swing your belly like a wrecking ball and say, “Yup, big as an elephant!” as the less-than-innocent commenter flies through the air. But . . . it’s probably better to use words. So here are some ideas:

1. For the unintentionally rude comment (e.g., Wow your ankles look huge!”), I sometimes just smiled and said “Thanks!” or “Thanks for the feedback.”

2. Choose to be amused instead of annoyed. This isn’t always easy, but it can be done.

3. If you don’t know the commenter, you can always pretend not to speak _______ (insert your native language. Probably English, since you’re reading this).

4. If you’re dealing with unsolicited advice (especially delivery horror stories or “proven methods to calm a colicky baby” stories, changing the subject (doggedly, if necessary) will usually do the trick. With these types of comments, you usually know the person, so you’ve gotta be a little more careful here. I usually found that it was more painless to say, “So, tell me about your new job,” or something, than to say, “Actually, Aunt Bertha, my pediatrician says . . .”).

Ok, now for a couple that I really find amusing but you probably shouldn’t actually use (under most circumstances anyway . . . J)

1. For pregnancy-related hugeness comments, try responding with, “I’m not pregnant.”

2. And my all time favorite . . . Resort to third-grade tactics. It’s a surefire response no matter what the comment. If someone says “Your baby needs a hat,” you simply respond, “No you need a hat.” And so forth.

But seriously. Whatever it is you say or don’t say, let the experience make you a more empathetic mom/friend in thinking twice before judging another belly mama. Like it or not, we’ve all likely been on the “well-meaning but exasperating advice” end of things.

make your own: finger puppets!

i am all about fun, easy, and inexpensive craft ideas.

especially crafts that my little guy can enjoy.

that probably explains my recent obsession with felt. who would have guessed that a sheet of felt could offer endless possibilities for crafts--and for only about ten cents a sheet!

lately, i have been on a finger puppet kick. since i have already made some farm animals, and need a horse to add to the collection, that's what this tutorial will be:

{my pre-made finger puppet pig, cow, and chicken}

the best thing about this project is you don't need a sewing machine!

here is the line-up of what you will need:

{a needle, glue gun, thick thread, scissors, and light and dark brown felt}

i already had the felt pre-cut, but the size of the finger puppets are approx. 1-1/2" wide x 3" tall. i just rounded the tops to create the look i was going for.

the ears are just small triangles--you can make them as big or as small as you want.

and the actual head of the horse, again, was something i just eyeballed. i wish i knew how to make a printable pattern for you. but the pictures below show the face pretty up-close and personal so i think you should be able to do it. if you have any questions at all, let me know!

once everything is cut out and glued into place, you are ready to start stitching! {is glued a word??} this is my favorite part. the stitch is actually really easy, so don't run away if you aren't a sewer.

if you are new to the blanket stitch like i was, check out this great tutorial by future girl.

and then, just go to town on your horse! stitch around the entire edge of the horse, starting inside the finger puppet to hide your knot. at the end of the stitch, i just make a double knot, and then cut as close to the knot as possible to hide it all.

a word of warning: when gluing on the mane + ears, make sure you glue on the back side of each piece. i forgot to do that with the horsie, and because of that i was unable to do the blanket stitch on the front. i continued the stitch on the back, but now the horse isn't as uniform as the pig. just remember that when you are making your own! :)

and here is the finished product! our little barn is now complete.

{if you are interested in making a barn as well, check out the link below to handmade by jill. her quiet book is inspiring!}

you aren't limited to animals with finger puppets, either! i made these little historical finger puppets for a project i had in school. they took a little more time {especially since i decided to get so intricate on some of them...} but i was very pleased with how they turned out! if you need further directions on how to make people, feel free to email me: bellymamas@gmail.com

{beethoven, leonardo da vinci, king louis VI, shakespeare, martin luther, and queen elizabeth}

if finger puppets aren't exactly your thing, but you are still interested in playing around with felt, check out these sites. i can almost guarantee that you will find something to satisfy your little one {or you!}:

adorable felt food + quiet book: homemade by jill

butterfly mobile: bugs and fishes

pillow with rosette clusters: felt furnishings

felt wreath + woven felt placemats + felt flower pillows + rose bud barrettes: the purl bee

what other fun, inexpensive crafts have you made for your little ones??

i'd LOVE to hear!

take time for yourself.

it's important that as a mama you remember to take time for yourself.

whether it's a moment of meditation,

a solo trip to the store,

or just doing something you love.

make a wish, dream big, start a new hobby, take a deep breath,

embrace motherhood, embrace your spirit, and remember to take time for you.

Halloween Ideas for your Baby

I love Halloween. When I was little, I spent months brainstorming my costume with my mom and almost always ended up switching it last minute. Typical, right?

Halloween has a different meaning for me now that I have my own family. Last Halloween, I was in labor for 15 hours with my sweet daughter. My doctor delivered my newborn baby while wearing a Halloween tie, and all of my nurses had on orange scrubs or spider web tee-shirts. I bought a cute Halloween outfit for her to wear home, and she ended up being bigger than newborn sizes. We couldn’t even put it over her head!! I was very disappointed (but happy she was a chunky healthy baby)! I knew from that day, Halloween would always be exciting for us. Hopefully, not as gory as last year. I promised myself not to be that kind of mom that dressed her 5 year old in a Nordstroms Gift Box. –ahem ahem Thanks Mom!-

Here are some great ideas for this year for your newborn to toddler child. Thankfully, most of these ideas range from 0-3 months all the way to 5T! I know some of you can spurge a bit on costumes. And some even sew and create your own. (email us those ideas!).

All under $25.00

Monkey;  Elephant; Giraffe; Ladybug; Princess Leia; Dragon; Hamburger

If I knew about these newborn ideas, I would have brought home our baby from the hospital wearing one of these! Perfect for newborn-3-6 months.

Penguin, Cat, Lion                                                           Pumpkin, boy and girl skeleton



The best family costume that I've seen:

The best advice I can give you is to be creative and ask around! Every Halloween party that my husband and I have been to we are the most "decked" out. After getting over the initial shock of being the only one with full face paint and costumes, everyone said that they wished they dressed up too! So, don't be that awkward family not dressed up. You have a month to get your costumes together! Email us your pictures and we'll post them up after Halloween!

-Meagan

Having Trouble Sleeping?

Anyone who knows me well, knows that I use to be the deepest of deep sleepers. I could sleep anywhere- on the floor, in movie theaters (husband hated that one), through a fire alarm (probably not so good). It wasn't until after giving birth to Jayne that I started suffering severe insomnia. It would take me 2 hours or longer to fall asleep at night. I was waking up every couple hours throughout the night as wide awake as could be while my baby was snoozing the night away in her crib. I was exhausted during the day. My doctor reassured me that it was likely just anxiety or stress of having a new baby. I found this somewhat hard to believe because although it was definitely a new adjustment having this baby in my life, I wouldn't have said I felt very stressed or anxious about it. I had a lot of help around the house from my husband and was lucky to have a pretty easy going baby. Regardless, I didn't question the docs advice and tried every trick in the book to help calm my body and mind before bed: hot showers, stretching, yoga, sleep medicine, meditation, lavender oil, adjusting my diet- and nothing was working. It wasn't until I started doing some serious research on insomnia and possible side effects that I figured out a thing or two (or three or four). I thought I would share it with you in hopes it might help any of you out there who may be struggling with the same thing.

There are many factors that could be affecting your nights sleep. It may even be a combination of a few. Common reasons are stress, anxiety, or depression. But did you know insomnia can also be a side effect from birth control or even breastfeeding?!  It wasn't until I started researching and thinking back to when my insomnia started that I realized I wasn't sleeping because of a combination of my birth control (I was on the Depo Shot) and breastfeeding. The hormones from both were giving me the side effects of sleep insomnia. Lack of sleep was also contributing to stress and anxiety, two extra factors that were inhibiting my sleep- like one really bad cycle. It was a total nightmare! As a result I switched birth control (no more birth control hormones for me!) and weaned my daughter off breastfeeding and switched to a bottle. As soon as I did those things I started sleeping better and better. Now I am able to sleep through the night again, and the stress of that nightmare is behind me. 

Don't lose hope if you are struggling with sleep after having a baby. Do your research, meet with a doctor, and get it resolved. 

There are not many things worse than missing out on a good nights sleep. Get those much needed zzzzzzzzz and start sleeping like a baby again! (well, a baby that sleeps through the night anyway, right?)

Homemade baby food 101

You make your own baby food? Really? Isn't it so much easier to just buy the jars at the store? I don't have that much time.

I got comments like these all the time from friends and/or family members when it was discovered that I make my son's baby food. To be honest, I thought some of the same things: that I didn't have the time and that it would be much too difficult. I had a great homemade baby food mentor who showed me otherwise.

First off, I'll tell you my reasons for wanting to make my child's baby food:

1) Making your own baby food is SO much cheaper. By like 1/2! The first month of making baby food, I did a little price comparison and I would have spent double buying the jars (or plastic tins now). That is reason enough to sign me up!

2) Homemade baby food is healthier. You know exactly what the ingredients are and you never add things that end in "acid" or "concentrate".

Now, here a few things to know about making your own baby food. The 411, if you will.

• The whole process is cook (steaming or roasting), puree, then freeze. You have to cook most foods to soften them up enough to puree them. I just use my steamer that came with my pan or I roast (mainly vegetables) them in the oven.


• A food processor is ideal for pureeing, but I use my blender that's attached to my Bosch and it has worked wonderfully. All you have to do is add a little water (or leftover cooking liquid if you've used a steamer) and puree away. Just add liquid until it is a nice yogurt consistency.


• Once pureed, all you do is pour into your containers and put in the freezer. I found that ice cube trays (I loved the silicone ones!) are the easiest and cheapest. Once frozen, pop into labeled freezer bags and you're done.

Easy enough, right?

Besides the money saving, one of my favorite parts has been being able to be creative and come up with different concoctions. I was lucky enough to have my husband (who happens to be a fabulous cook) right along side me pureeing away. He enjoyed making the baby food just as much as I did, and loved cooking up combinations for our babe. Obviously, easy things to make are bananas, sweet potatoes, or squash. But some of my son's favorites were blueberries & pears, applesauce with cinnamon and raisins, cauliflower gratin (cauliflower, tomato and cheese), and sweet potatoes & broccoli. The possibilities are pretty much endless :)

As far as the time commitment? Honestly, I only spent a couple hours every few weeks. Most of that time was just waiting for food to steam or cool down. And that is making enough food to sustain my eat-as-much-as-a-horse son! Surprising even to me, it does not take much time at all.

To go from the frozen ice cubes of food to the table, I would simply put how ever many cubes I wanted in a small ziploc bag and thaw in hot water for a few minutes. If I was really good and on top of things, I would set out the baggies for the whole day the night before to thaw. But we all know that didn't happen very often. Personally, I didn't like the idea of nuking all of my babe's nutrients out, so I stayed clear of the microwave. However, if you don't have any microwave nuking fears, then it can make it that much easier for you!

Now that my son's almost done with the babyfood days, I will say that I actually enjoyed the whole process and without any question will be making babyfood for the rest of my children!

Any of you make your own babyfood? Any tips that you'd like to share?

I have A TON of babyfood "recipes" that I'd be happy to forward along, so feel free to send us an email (bellymamas@gmail.com) if you want them!

Who's Your Daddy: Creating a Parenting Partnership that Works

Before I had my baby, I envisioned myself as a capable, independent mom who would do her “job” and let my husband do his jobs. Sort of a separate but equal kind of thing. I looked down a little bit on moms who, when said husband came home from a long day at work, immediately handed him a poopy, crying baby. (If you’ve read my other posts, you may be coming to realize that I was way too judgmental of moms. Good thing I am one now and eat my words—and thoughts—all the time, huh? J )

Anyway, that perspective was a tad unenlightened to say the least (with a few caveats anyway), and I’m grateful my husband didn’t share the same view. He’s been a huge help from day one. It helps me with the work and responsibilities a baby brings, and maybe even more important, it makes me feel like he understands how difficult being a mom is sometimes, since he’s willing to step up to the plate even after he’s had a long day at work or school. So, moving right along, here’s a few things we’ve learned along the way/learned from watching others about making the parenting partnership work:

• One of the things I initially found so frustrating about motherhood was that the job never ends, especially in those first few months when baby is waking up round the clock. During those months I daydreamed about having a job that would let me clock out and go home, to spend my evening in peace, recharge, and prepare for the next day. Sharing responsibilities in the evening keeps you from getting burned out. For the first few months especially, we made it a point of having some out-of-the-house errand I could do—by myself—once my husband got home. I know running an errand seems like a little thing, but it was so nice to have a minute to myself. As Luke got older, and when my husband’s schedule allowed for it, we stepped this up a bit. Now I take a class once a week for about an hour and volunteer once a week for a couple hours, while the boys have some Daddy-son time.

• One of the things I’ve had to keep myself in check with is expecting my husband to take over completely once he gets home for the day. Sharing the load is crucial to a healthy partnership, but sometimes I selfishly decide that I’m the only one who’s had a long day, and now I deserve a break (some guys have this same attitude about coming home from their job).

• Don’t get into “whose job is harder” arguments. Nobody ever wins these, and it just makes both of you feel bad/like your contribution isn’t valued. However, I have found it very helpful to talk to my hubby about why being a mom is hard sometimes/what I feel like I need the most help with. Don’t keep your frustrations and concerns in—but do remember that how you voice them is crucial.

• On the same note, it also helps me to hear about my husband’s day/what he’s working on/what he’s got on his plate and his concerns, etc. Sometimes it feels like he gets to go off and “have fun” while I stay home with Mr. Poopypants (no offense, Luke). It helps to have a reminder that this isn’t the case.

• Take the lead in getting in the habit of thanking one another for help/showing appreciation, even for things that seem routine. Maybe it’s part of your routine that your husband usually gives baby a bath each night. Thank him for doing it anyway.

• Try not to stress about it if Daddy doesn’t do everything exactly “right” when he’s on baby duty. Just be grateful he’s on baby duty J Critiquing him for not strapping the diaper on just right is a surefire way to discourage him from wanting to change it. It’s a given he’s not going to do things the way you do them, but try not to stress out about it. You’ll all be just fine.